Friday, October 5, 2007

Jonathan Lee Riches and the Brady bunch

Jonathan Lee Riches, the prisoner plaintiff who filed law suits this summer against sports celebrities including Michael Vick and Barry Bonds, has a new fish to fry — and this time he’s doing it in Maryland.

In a suit filed Wednesday in federal court in Greenbelt, Riches asked for a temporary restraining order against one “John L. Brady” as well as a 1963 Supreme Court opinion featuring an erstwhile death-row inmate by that same moniker, better known as *Brady v. Maryland.*

Yes, you read that right. He’s seeking a TRO against a Supreme Court decision. One of the most famous Supreme Court opinions, too: the one that requires prosecutors to tell the defendant about any evidence they have that would help his case. Fittingly, Riches accuses *Brady* (the opinion) of withholding evidence that would clear him of a crime.

He also accuses Brady (the person) of withholding medication from him, which caused him to rob a pharmacy. And here’s where it gets juicy.

Riches claims that Brady "is related to Cleveland Brown Quarterback Brady Quinn, who has my brain in a football, tossing my brain tissue during football games because I sued LeBron James in court. This is a Cleveland connection. Salt ‘n Peppa.”

Riches also says the defendants took his “Nobel peace prize on writing law suits,” that the Watergate burglars broke into his cell with a crow bar, and that he is the father of Angelina Jolie’s five children. You have to read the rest to see why he sued Terri Schiavo and Florida State Football Coach Bobby Bowden.

So here’s my question: is the South Carolina inmate really crazy (in the suit he says “I spin like a Disney cup”) or is this all an ongoing joke he likes to play on the federal courts? And if it is a joke, does that make Riches a comic genius? Or do you just feel sorry for the federal clerks that have to deal with this guy’s shenanigans?

-LIZ FARMER, Legal Affairs Writer


Anonymous said...

I think he should be convicted and spend his jail time writing a great novel. With imagination like that he has the potential to be the next Stephen King. How do I contact him to be his agent?

Anonymous said...

This guy is a genius!!!! God bless him!!!