It’s bad and it’s back!

Muscle heads unite! American Gladiators is back!

Yep…that’s right! Harking back to the days of frosted mullets and Zubaz, the network that brought you The Office and The Cosby Show announced last week that it was bringing back America’s favorite steroid-sculpted super heroes!!

For those of you brave enough to take on these muscle-bound ruffians for your 15 minutes of fame, NBC has a simple application for you to fill out like your favorite jeans…(That’s right, we all know the girls are checking you out in those. You don’t look ridiculous at all. Promise!)

But 95-pound weaklings don’t despair! Brute force isn’t the only qualifier! Poetry can get you on the show!!! (Come on, you didn’t think they were only looking for Neanderthals, did you? They want sensitive guys and gals who can quote Whitman while challenging the Gauntlet!)

And, don’t worry if you don’t have the velvet pen, flowery prose and can’t tell the difference between Iambic and Pentameter, the all-knowing-Peacock is going to let those of you who can drop a rhyme like your favorite 90s gangsta rapper a way to get in, too.

There’s a spot on the application for you to submit a rap!! Oh yeah!!
(Wait…Bad rap. Mullets. Neanderthals. Am I the only one that has visions of Kevin Federline dancing in my head right now?)

Okay, while I go beat the PopoZao out of my head by smashing it repeatedly against the nearest wall, why don’t you drop us a poem or a rap for a shot. We’ll pass the best ones on…promise!

-LOUIS LLOVIO, Daily Record Business Writer